On the job front, I'm going to switch to working part-time in a couple weeks. This means I will only work two 12-hour shifts per week. I shed a lot of tears before coming to this decision. My current job has created more stress than I am willing to endure. My husband deserves a loving wife, and my children need a healthy mom. And I need to feel sane and not be in 'survival mode' all the time.
Another decision that I need to make (soon!) is whether to continue working night shift. Our floor has had several nurses move on in their careers. This means there will be a day shift position available to me in the very near future. I have gotten somewhat comfortable with my job as a night nurse, meaning the tasks that I perform and the routine and pace of hospital nightlife (the pace of day nursing on my floor is sheer insanity.) I love my nighttime coworkers and really don't want to leave them. However, my quality of life outside of work is less than ideal. I don't get regular sleep, and this makes me feel super emotional and even psychotic. Just plain miserable. I would venture to say that I felt better when I was in nursing school than I do now... and that's saying something!
Speaking of school, I have applied for admission to the University of Arkansas at Little Rock! I'm going to continue my education and work toward a Bachelor of Science in Nursing (BSN) degree. This will be part-time and all online so it will fit nicely into our family life. Plus, it seems with a scholarship, a grant, and a small amount of employee tuition assistance, I won't have to pay much (if any!) for further schooling. Score!
I have applied for two positions in Labor & Delivery in the past month. Apparently the hospital requires 12 months of experience as an RN before they will hire me into L&D. But I will keep applying as positions come available. I am also looking into getting involved with a local group of doulas and midwives. I don't want to get involved in too many things all at once because my soul craves simplicity.
I have no idea what my career is going to look like in 5 or 10 years. But I am okay with that. The mystery of it is enjoyable for me. One of my favorite quotes (by Martin Luther King, Jr.) is this:
"You don't have to see the top of the staircase in order to take the first step."
Or, in my case, the next step...
What I am certain of at this very moment is that I treasure my husband and adore my three children more than words can convey. My profession as a Registered Nurse is important to me, but it pales in comparison to the value I place on the life of my family. The kids are growing up too quickly, and our years of marriage are adding up (10 years this month!) I want to maximize every single day we have together.
So...Happy Mother's Day! Happy Nurse's Day!
...and hopefully a happier Everyday!
6 comments:
Wonderful wonderful on all counts! I'll be praying for your transition to part-time...and that L/D will let you in before 12 months -- they don't know what they're missin'!
My dear friend, I am so pleased to hear that you have enough clarity for today and the peace and boldness to follow through. I have been dealing with similar issues of balance and priority, your thoughts are encouraging. Thanks for sharing them. :) -K
Autumn: it sounds like you have considered your priorities and what you have written seems to be in line with what I know about you.
I am here to help support you in any way I can. And your sister is right - L/D is missing out on a great lady - hopefully they realize that sooner, rather than later!
Yay! I am happy to hear that you've seemed to have found a nice balance that will work, bring back some peace, and keep you sane :) It's not easy making those types of decisions...I will continue to pray for direction and open doors for you!!!
Awesome to hear that you are continuing your eduction. Way to go. Can't wait to hear more about it and the involvement with the doulas and midwives. How interesting and exciting!!!
Keep it up, my friend. You always inspire me :)
I agree with the other commenters. So glad you have been able to make some solid decisions. I too will be praying for you as you move forward in your education and all the other changes taking place :)
completely loving this post :)
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